We all fall down…
Seriously. In the last week we ALL fell down. My Kiddo on Sun, me on Tue & my mother on Thursday. (She officially fractured her left radius… She is also left handed like me.) Today my brother posted this:
”I also fell this week going to the laundry room to get a towel, right when I hit the hall floor slipped and fell full on feet in the air flat on my back and elbow. I don’t think we’re falling something is pushing us down.”
His daughter is the only one who has not fallen this week (that I know of.) Bear in mind we all live in separate time zones and haven’t seen each other in years. All I can say is “WHAT THE FUCK?”
I’m still learning how to stop apologizing
for all that I am; I wear my skin like a blanket
that’s never been able to keep you warm enough
and Mom always used to say if you stay out in
the cold, you’re gonna get sick, I don’t want you
getting sick, please, don’t get sick of me.
I’m wearing out my I’m sorry’s like my
dignity’s on clearance but please hear me, they’ve
got me mislabeled. I’m not trying to sell anything, I’m
just trying to keep you around. And I know that the sound
of the same syllables over and over can become like your
favorite melody ruined by your alarm clock telling you to
wake up to nothing ever changing, but I’m trying,
and I’m afraid of what happens
when the music stops playing.
I hope my I love you’s never stop making
your heartbeat do pirouettes along your ribcage.
I hope my sadness doesn’t replace my name
on your Caller ID, I hope that you remember that
this isn’t me, that my genetics fell on a fault line and
my happiness fluctuates on the days of the week, but I
still love you with every tremor in every earthquake of my
universe. I love you when I go away; when I am nothing
but tired eyes and chapped lips and empty, and empty, when I
force you to cradle my missed calls against your cheek because
I’ve adopted an impediment in positive speech, I’m sorry. I’m
sorry that we had to drive back to the house on Tuesday when I
forgot to take my pills, and I’m sorry that I’m not up for going out
tomorrow, I’m sorry that my mind wanders sometimes when you
tell me about your day, I- I do want to hear about your day,
I am so sorry
and yeah, I’m still learning how
to stop apologizing, baby, but I still love you, so hard.
Mainly, I’m just –
mainly, I’m just sorry
for being selfish enough to ask you to stay.
"Why Your Depressed Lover Keeps Saying Sorry" -Valentina Thompson (via theseoverusedwords)
Wow…I could have written that. Word for word.
I can’t find my words. This is so.. REAL to me.
Call Me “Lefty”
Day 3 in the sling:
If I was into age play this would be hot. But both of us are, frankly, creeped out by that particular kink.
My Mr. has had to fasten and unfasten my bra, put on my shoes & socks and had to help me cut my nails. My stubborn ass was trying by using the weight of my forearm to push the clippers down onto my nail. He had to put my deodorant on me because the pressure of applying it made me cry. He’s had to tie my hair up to shower on the nights I wasn’t washing it and wrap the towel on my head on the nights I did.
We’re going to a party tomorrow night and he *kinda* offered to curl my hair for me since I’m self conscious about going out with it not done. He may also have to help me shave. -_- It’s a naked movie night.
I will never doubt his love for me!
I just really want to be able to drive again soon. My Miata & I have been waiting for this weather. The top has not come down yet & this week would be perfect.
It comes in 3’s
Last weekend was awesome! We ran away for a night down south to see a burlesque tribute to “The Princess Bride.” Sunday we detoured for a day of roller coasters before driving home. I anticipated bruises and a sore throat…
I did not anticipate spending Sunday night with My Kiddo in Urgent Care. She fell off her new skate board & ended up with both wrists in braces… Fast forward to Tuesday on my way out of work for lunch. My foot caught just wrong on the concrete steps & down I went. I had my coffee mug in my left hand (it didn’t break! Go me!) so all my weight came down on my right arm & tailbone.
Despite my manual transmission, I made it home before the adrenaline wore off & I realized I needed to go to Urgent Care. My Kiddo was about to go out skateboarding (wrist braces and all!) and drove me in her car.
Here’s the kicker: I logged into FB this morning to see a picture of my mother with her hand all swollen & awful looking. She took a fall at work & had not yet gone to Urgent Care. No word yet on whether or not its broken. *sigh* That makes all 3 generations of us women injured by falls in less than a week.
I’ve been in a sling since Tue & the bruising on my tail bone is starting to show through. On the upside, I’m left-handed so it didn’t take me long to get used to using the mouse with my left hand and I type one-handed faster than most pre-webcam cyber sexers! Now if only My Mr. was better practiced at doing hair I could be *almost* okay with being an invalid.
Or not… he’s doing his best to take care of me but I’m too damn stubborn to let him.
Now to decide what’s left in my closet that I can wear to work and maneuver on & off one-handed!
Nothing like a shot of Demerol to liven up my Tuesday… Sprained right elbow & bruised tail bone. But I didn’t break the coffee mug I was holing. So there’s that. And I’m left-handed… Now if only I could shift gears in a sling. *sigh*
I’m such a fucking klutz!