wildcat2030:

Multiple Lovers, Without Jealousy -Polyamorous people still face plenty of stigmas, but some studies suggest they handle certain relationship challenges better than monogamous people do. - When I met Jonica Hunter, Sarah Taub, and Michael Rios on a typical weekday afternoon in their tidy duplex in Northern Virginia, a very small part of me worried they might try to convert me. All three live there together, but they aren’t roommates—they’re lovers. Or rather, Jonica and Michael are. And Sarah and Michael are. And so are Sarah and whomever she happens to bring home some weekends. And Michael and whomever he might be courting. They’re polyamorous. Michael is 65, and he has a chinstrap beard that makes him look like he just walked off an Amish homestead. Jonica is 27, with close-cropped hair, a pointed chin, and a quiet air. Sarah is 46 and has an Earth Motherly demeanor that put me at relative ease. Together, they form a polyamorous “triad”— one of the many formations that’s possible in this jellyfish of a sexual preference. “There’s no one way to do polyamory” is a common refrain in “the community.” Polyamory—which literally means “many loves”—can involve any number of people, either cohabiting or not, sometimes all having sex with each other, and sometimes just in couples within the larger group. Sarah and Michael met 15 years ago when they were both folk singers and active in the polyamorous community. Both of them say they knew from a young age that there was something different about their sexuality. “Growing up, I never understood why loving someone meant putting restrictions on relationships,” Michael said. “What I love about polyamory is that everything is up for modification,” Sarah says. “There are no ‘shoulds.’ You don’t have to draw a line between who is a lover and who is a friend. It’s about what is the path of my heart in this moment.”
go read.. fascinating..
(via Multiple Lovers, Without Jealousy - The Atlantic)

Reblogging again. 

wildcat2030:

Multiple Lovers, Without Jealousy
-
Polyamorous people still face plenty of stigmas, but some studies suggest they handle certain relationship challenges better than monogamous people do.
-
When I met Jonica Hunter, Sarah Taub, and Michael Rios on a typical weekday afternoon in their tidy duplex in Northern Virginia, a very small part of me worried they might try to convert me. All three live there together, but they aren’t roommates—they’re lovers. Or rather, Jonica and Michael are. And Sarah and Michael are. And so are Sarah and whomever she happens to bring home some weekends. And Michael and whomever he might be courting. They’re polyamorous. Michael is 65, and he has a chinstrap beard that makes him look like he just walked off an Amish homestead. Jonica is 27, with close-cropped hair, a pointed chin, and a quiet air. Sarah is 46 and has an Earth Motherly demeanor that put me at relative ease. Together, they form a polyamorous “triad”— one of the many formations that’s possible in this jellyfish of a sexual preference. “There’s no one way to do polyamory” is a common refrain in “the community.” Polyamory—which literally means “many loves”—can involve any number of people, either cohabiting or not, sometimes all having sex with each other, and sometimes just in couples within the larger group. Sarah and Michael met 15 years ago when they were both folk singers and active in the polyamorous community. Both of them say they knew from a young age that there was something different about their sexuality. “Growing up, I never understood why loving someone meant putting restrictions on relationships,” Michael said. “What I love about polyamory is that everything is up for modification,” Sarah says. “There are no ‘shoulds.’ You don’t have to draw a line between who is a lover and who is a friend. It’s about what is the path of my heart in this moment.”

go read.. fascinating..

(via Multiple Lovers, Without Jealousy - The Atlantic)

Reblogging again. 

(via learningpoly)

vintagegal:

Hilda by Duane Bryers

I want someone to make me a red leaf bikini like she’s wearing… Hilda: the first real plus size model. *LOVE* Her! 

(via tessataboo)

Not giving up

But it feels really shitty to not see something to the end… 

Tonight was to be my last burlesque class. The instructor is putting together a student showcase next month for our class as well as another class by a favorite performer of mine. Between the day job sucking the life out of me and the.. well, the fun we have on the weekends, I simply have not had time to finish my costume or practice anything resembling choreography. I e-mailed my instructor today telling her that if they need a stage kitten I’m in, but I’m not going to have my act together. Rather than drive out there and cut into rehearsal time for the other 3 ladies who have their acts lined up and ready to roll, I’m staying home tonight. 

I’m not giving up, but am accepting that I’m just not in a place to make this happen right now. Makes me sad, but it’s better than getting on stage and half-assing it. 

Back to the hamster wheel. 

Poly People Problems*

*First off- I hate the term “poly” but that’s another rant I’ll save for later.

Secondly, I love alliteration. 

Here’s the short version:

Couple A: non-monogamous for many years. Friends of ours for quite awhile. Wife A had an almost thing with My Mr. They are still close friends. 

Couple B: Newly open. 

Husband A and Wife B are dating. Wife B was Husband A’s date to our last discussion and I thought she was great. 

Wife A and Husband B were dating.. ‘ish. Wife A was going to bring Husband B to tonight’s discussion group then told My Mr. that they were cooling off and that he was taking a break from the non-monogamy stuff. Wife B changed her RSVP over the weekend to be just her. 

This morning Husband B messaged both of us on OkC. The message was light, friendly and a little flirty. Husband B is just as cute as his wife.

This afternoon Wife A changed her RSVP again and told My Mr. that’s she’s bringing Husband B tonight. 

My Mr. was struggling with whether or not to tell Wife B about the OkC messages. I said that telling her tonight wouldn’t help anything and that we should see how Husband B behaves before deciding what or if to divulge. 

The question is whether this was all a coincidence,or if Husband B is using Wife B to meet us. We won’t really know until they get here, but I’m curious how this might look to an outside party?

Thoughts?

kino2244:

When people say to a boy "That’s for girls" 

There seems to be an implication that liking or associating with anything feminine or girly is wrong and somehow beneath them.

When people say to a girl "That’s for boys"

There seems to be an implication that they must remember their place.

What a great perspective to share for tonight’s discussion! 

(via polyamorous-love)

And in other news…

I went to my first rope event last weekend. BF1 was there as was his ‘rope spirit animal.’ To say I enjoyed myself is an understatement. The next night we went to a Kink 101 event and I learned that ‘thuddy’ can be as good as ‘stingy.’ 

I’ve been really worn out this week, but have a lot going on. We are hosting  our discussion group tomorrow night: “Gender and Judgements” I’ll add the link to our jumping off point at the bottom. 

Thursday is my last burlesque class but I’m pretty sure I’m not going to be stage ready for the October show the instructor is trying to put together. 

My day job continues to frustrate me to no end. 

I got tired of random spammy messages on MeetUp and removed my picture from all but our group and today it hit me that the kinds of messages like I get on OkC a lot are just the internet version of being catcalled. I was all ranty about it, but now that I’ve got a full belly and comfy couch I’m just too tired to think about it all.

Time to re-watch the TedTalk and prep for tomorrow night. 

http://youtu.be/NRcPXtqdKjE

Bangs.. and I LOVE them! 

Bangs.. and I LOVE them! 

beginning-poly:

hawk-and-handsaw:

a crappy info-doodle about something v important 2 me

I’m sorry - but this is too ridiculous and funny NOT to share!!!

I totally read this in infommercial voice… “But wait, there’s more!” 

I miss skating! Wish I had the guts (and tolerance for actual injury) to go out for derby. 

(via xojanedotcom)

psychophancy:

I’ve found a matchmaker for poly couples!

Where can we find this??

psychophancy:

I’ve found a matchmaker for poly couples!

Where can we find this??

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